Idiocity of Sports Fanacits

Ok, so this post has to do with an argument I had today with my parents. The more I sit here, the angrier I get that they don’t see where I am coming from, so I’ll leave you, my little bloggets, to decide whether I’m right or crazy.

Today, I had the task of cleaning the two bedrooms. Recently, both of my younger brothers left the nest for job opportunities however, annoyingly they left a lot of their shit here at home for me and my rents to deal with. Well, today I was switching rooms and hanging my clothes in the closet in the other room. Now this seems like it would be an easy task, however, due to my youngest brother’s obsession with the Green Bay Packers, the closet is full, and I mean full, of Packer jerseys that he has no use for during the summer months. Why anyone needs 16 different jerseys (I counted) is beyond me. So I took this issue up with my mom, telling her I think its ridiculous that he has so many and that they are taking up my closet space. However, this isn’t the issue Im about to discuss.

The Issue: Guys/Girls (mostly guys/lesbians) who are such sports fanatics of a certain teams that they feel they needs to dress up every game and associate themselves with them. I.E. Act/talk like they are on the team.

When I discuss this issue, what I am referring to is when guys/girls/lesbians  get all dressed up in their gear and if that isn’t enough to deal with, they will talk to you throughout the game and at the end as if they are on the team. “We just didn’t play any pass defense.” “Coach should’ve taken Farve out, he’s been playing like shit all game. What is he thinking?” “We just couldn’t get any runs in the 9th to rally back.” Ok, seriously, of course you couldn’t get any runs in the bottom of the 9th, because you suck and don’t play professional baseball, and the guys out there playing actually don’t know who you are. Now to be clear, children are excluded from this rant. I, like most kids growing up, had jerseys of their favorite idols. I rocked a Reggie Miller and Michael Jordan jersey both. However, once you hit a certain age, don’t you think its time to grow up and just watch the game? When I brought this issue up with my parents and talked about how I felt my youngest brother Ian maybe needed to grow up a bit, they defended him. Straight up defended said that was normal and a lot of people do it. Okay…I get that, but just because a lot of people do it doesn’t mean its not retarded.

Naturally, I had to get back at my parents for equal opportunity purchases in the household just to prove a point. Since I don’t do jerseys, because I’m not idiotic sports fan, I told my parents I want a pair of blue nursing scrubs. Now every Thursday night when I watch Grey’s Anatomy, I can dress like my favorite doctors and then talk to my family/friends about how “we just weren’t able to save that guy tonight because the damage to his heart was to much.” Does that sound weird to anyone else because in my eyes I actually feel it’s the exact same shit I have to put with when I watch sporting events in public places…or with certain family members/friends.

Editors Note: Views were originally expressed by Whitney Cummings, however I still used them in the argument with my parents just because I like to be a bitch and tell them I am not treated equally with my brothers. 

Life Update: #1

Hey everyone!!! I’m not even sure anyone still checks this but if for some reason you stumble upon it, you’ll be pleasantly surprised to see there is a new post. Since I have never been one for words or stories, I don’t really have anything traditional to blog about in this post, so I’m just going to give a life update. My life since graduating from college has been anything but the glitz and glam I assumed would just happen. I started drinking more, I don’t know if that is considered a good thing or not but it helps pass the time when living in a town of 800. Yes, to those who don’t know I moved home. Can we say “Lima Loser” anyone? I’m actually starting to adjust to it. I still refuse to befriend anyone in this town because once you start friending the townies, that means you plan on staying here awhile which I absolutely would loath with fiber of my being. I continuously apply pretty much everywhere. I am even risking my husky body and applied at a candy company. Obviously if I would get a job there I’d get the betes 2 (pronounced: beat es) but the risk I’m willing to take to get Joe off my ass about being unemployed with too much time on my hands. However, in my spare time I have started to run a daily basis again. I’m training for a half marathon in June, plus I have 4 weddings this summer and of course I wanna look better than anyone there (brides included). Also, I have notched up my tv intake. I obsessed over Veronica Mars, finished the 1st season in 2 days. Average: 11 episodes per day. The next two seasons weren’t as amazing so they took a tad longer but I had it finished within a week and half. Now I have started on Dollhouse. I was nervous at first but its gettin good. Plus it stars Eliza Dushk-my love for her started when she starred opposite Kirsten Dunst in “Bring It On” as the bad ass gymnast who couldn’t cheer. Now, I have also found time to read 2 books. I started a new vampire series-The House of Night-its like a cross between Harry Potter and Twilight however its not nearly as good or entertaining as them. In exciting news, Scre4m comes out this Friday. I love scary movies. Love, Love, Love them! Seeing that this coming weekend is on the top of my list of things to do.

I plan on making a return trip to Cedar Falls on Thursday, April 21st. Daphne is playing at the Hub, natch a groupie and need to attend. Joe doesn’t have to work Friday so he’s in for a good time. I hope Emily and her new boo will make it out, even if its for a little bit. I know I can always count on Lauren and Neil to drink so I’m not worried about them. Hopefully Kev Rob will make a special surprise appearance. Really looking forward to that night, plus I have plans to go to Toads after Daph, hit the internet jukebox and play Rebecca Black’s Friday and Kelly Clarkson’s Since U Been Gone all while doing trust falls, which I busted out in La Crosse bars this weekend. Bartenders…loved it! Didn’t get yelled at or kicked out. People in the crowd thought I was crazy but they just don’t understand how we party in the valley.

Ok, so thats all I got for this update. Hopefully in my spare time I will find something important to blog about that more interesting, but until then: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference. -Bob Vander plaats

Miss you bitches.

Signs your new boyfriend/girlfriend might be a douchebag

1) They have LinkedIn and not Facebook.

Human Disaster?

1996

So I have this theory, it is a pretty simple theory. The theory is that 1996 is the greatest year of all time. Maybe not all time, but at least the greatest year in the 25 I have been alive. It is true, every year has great things and great moments. Things were different in 1996, everything that happened in 1996 seemed to be awesome! Except that O.A.R. formed as a band, damn they ruin some good nights of tunes at Toads.

Let me argue my point a bit. 1996 was the year that Michael Jordan and the Bulls finished 72-10 and won their first title of their second 3-peat. The shoes that Michael Jordan wore that entire year? Only my absolute favorite shoe of all time, the Air Jordan XI.

Everything about this shoe is beautiful, its hard to find many people who felt differently. Guess what else came out in 1996? My second absolute favorite shoe of all time, the Nike Air Griffey Max. I got these shoes for Christmas this year, and I remember going to Scheels when it was still in the building where Papa Murphy’s Pizza is now and just staring at these shoes. I still have my pair, size 9, I doubt I will ever throw them away.

Nike was using the “Griffey in 96” campaign to sell these shoes because it was an election year, John Deery had a Griffey in 96 shirt that I was super jealous of, I can’t believe my mom never bought me one.

Notice Joe Ellerbroek wearing some Air Jordan XI Black/Reds

Enough about shoes and sports, guess what else came out in 1996? The Fugees – The Score and 2Pac – All Eyez on Me. Both on February 13, 1996. The same damn day 2 classic albums were released in the 1996. Have you ever heard Killing Me Softly before? Unbelievable. Alanis Morissette’s – Ironic was popular in 1996, so was Bone Thugz N Harmony’s – Tha Crossroads, Jewel’s – Who Will Save Your Soul, Coolio’s – Gangsta’s Paradise, Beck’s – Where it’s At, and Smashing Pumpkins – Tonight, Tonight (Nirvana Who?!)

Nic Cage rocked the big screens in 1996 with his movie The Rock. We were also blessed with some great movies in Matilda, Happy Gilmore, Swingers, Tin Cup, SPACE JAM, Independence Day. It was a great year for John Travolta as he put out 2 of his best in Phenomenon and Michael. Maybe everyone’s favorite holiday movie ‘Jingle All the Way’ also came out in 1996. And the best Mighty Ducks movie, D3! (Maybe not)

Anybody know where I can get an Adam Banks jersey?

I suppose I could go all day defending my love for 1996, but you get the picture.

By the way, Topanga was killing it in 1996!

Emoticons

Can we all agree that this : ) is the proper way a smiley faces, not this? (:

Kevin, this is your alias, I know because I read two of her blog posts assuming they were yours

The cyberspace can be so funny can’t it? While searching our blog from my phone this morning, I got to the end of a post of Kevin’s when I saw a “related links” section, one specifically caught my eye titled, “Christmas Cards” I thought, “Excellent, another satirical post by Kevin, analyzing the weird ritual of Christmas cards.”

The link led me to one of Kevin’s greatest posts yet…

Christmas Cards
I finally got my Christmas cards all done and mailed today. I was just going to send cards with no Christmas letter. In years past I’ve sort of set the bar too high by writing a Christmas poem about our year, and I just wasn’t feeling that creative this year.

I started to do a Christmas letter with pictures two nights ago, but couldn’t get the pictures do what I wanted in Word. So I gave up. When I told my husband I was thinking of not doing a letter, he said, “But you are so good with words, don’t let the picture problems stop you.”

Then this morning my son asked me what I was writing in our Christmas cards. I replied, “Their name at the top, and Love, Linda, Randy, and Benton at the bottom.” “Lame,” he said. Or was it more like, “Laaaaaaame!”

Next I talked to my mother-in-law on the phone and mentioned I was finishing Christmas cards, but hadn’t written a letter. She said they had received three cards today and two didn’t even have letters. “We love getting all the Christmas letters,” she said.

So I wrote a Christmas letter telling about our trip to New York City, my son’s 10th grade exploits, my husband’s backpacking adventures, my ventures into blogging, and how our dog and cat are taking good care of us. I closed with this wish and prayer:

We hope this Christmas you are blessed by the most wonderful Christmas gift of all, Immanuel, God with us! May the joy of God’s love found in a manger dwell in your hearts forever.

Even if you are not on my Christmas card list, this wish and prayer is for you, too! Christmas is just a few days away and I pray that, in the midst of all the busyness of the season, you don’t miss the wonder of what this celebration is all about. Peace and Merry Christmas!

Kevin, that one part where you explained your son saying, “lame” and then corrected yourself to, “laaaammee” really had me rolling, and when you explained your problems editing in Word I thought, “Spot on Kev, that’s tooooo good.”
I was about to comment on your post when I noticed there were already a few comments by complete cyberspace strangers…

And that’s when it hit me

I had stumbled upon a real blog…. by an actual mom….. who actually writes about Christmas card dilemmas.
Don’t worry, I’m posting the URL http://www.lindakruschke.wordpress.com

My advice? Read it with Kevin’s smooth voice as the narrator, it will be much more enjoyable and easier to swallow.

Oh don’t worry about me, I’m just contemplating Myspace

bkballplyr13, whitey185, beastdawg09… these are the screen names I stare at all day while you continue to update yourselves on strangers’ relationship problems and hospital visits through my *old* friend, Facebook. Can you say that I’ve won in this situation? Not necessarily, considering Scott Hanneman and I haven’t spoken since mine and Ben Willoughby’s 9th grade sleepover, Adam Luehman was a temporary boyfriend from my 9th grade summer who I refused to give handies to, and Danny White hasn’t had ONE away message about his crazed relationship with Katie Hess-Thomas.

I want to update you on my life, this new life, without Facebook. When I say “without” I mean, I haven’t signed on, haven’t checked a single status update and made my entire profile private… I even deleted my wall.

Let’s do a good old-fashioned “T-table” to weigh out the pros and cons.

Pros:
My faith in humanity has raised approx 1% now that I have not had to look at Farmville updates and w.t. statuses from Palin lovers.

Related to my faith in humanity, my overall stress level has gone down, or at least I’m less irritable on a daily basis. When I can avoid minute by minute updates about your child’s schedule for the day, I tend to be a little more optimistic about my own

I am knowing less about people’s uterus’s

Cons:
I find myself trolling on Reddit a little more often than usual, getting bored with the slow speed of updating

I can be a bit tweet annoying when I feel like a rampage… (I forget it’s not just a mass text to our close friends)

Overall, I’m declaring it a win so far. I’ll admit, I do think about Facebook, but then I give myself a pat on the back for my efforts in moving on. Plus, I’m holding out for a Myspace comeback.

TV For Christmas

I got cable for Christmas,which reminds me of a certain disciplinary action that was taken on me in junior high.  Bear(bare) with me.  I got cable for christmas because my dad felt bad for me in the winter not having anything to do at home.  My good friend Mr Kuebler, Mold Technician(not the blue fuzzy stuff) pointed out to me that now it sounds like fun to come to my house, because of my additional channels.  So really, i got cable to get friends.

Which brings me to chewing gum.  In junior high, a letter got sent home to my parents from the Librarian.  For his privacy, we will call him Mr Atkins.

okay that is actually his name, and i dont give a damn about his privacy.

So he sent a letter to my parents along with a worksheet for me to fill out in regards to my recent violation: chewing gum in the library.  I had to answer the following multiple choice question:

I brought gum to school because;

A. I use it to make friends.  If i give people gum, they will be friends with me

B. I like to deface public property.  I chew my gum, and stick it under desks and in books.

C.  I like to defy authority.

So you be the judge.  Why did I bring gum to school?  is it because I wanted to make friends, similarly to why I upgraded my cable? Probably.  I am not much for defacing public property.  I am, however, super into defying authority.  For example: when it says on construction trucks, DO NOT FOLLOW INTO WORK AREA, i follow them.  Some people could care less where they are hauling that gravel,which makes the whole sign kind of pointless. But me, I care.  It gets a little awkward when I’m parked at a construction site, and everyone is staring at me while they eat their egg salad sammiches from their lunch pales, but WHATEVS.

If you are interested in what is new and happenin at the HJH library, follow this link

http://www.cedar-falls.k12.ia.us/our-schools/holmes-junior-high/holmes-library

 

thanks to my friends for giving me a platform to discuss the above mentioned important information.

 

WDE (miss u table)

TV for Christmas

I thought it would be a good idea for me to tell you guys about a couple of my personal favorite Christmas themed TV episodes I have seen in my life.  Every great show has at least one Christmas themed episode in their lifetime, I think the studio makes them, I don’t know for sure, I’m not a TV studio head.  Anyways, here we go.

Boy Meets World – Season 1 Episode 10 – “Santa’s Little Helper” – Originally aired December 10, 1993

This episode didn’t resonate the true meaning of Christmas until my 14th or 15th cycle of seeing all Boy Meets World episodes on TV.  Looking online at the episode synopsis, TV.com describes the episode this way:

When Shawn’s father loses his job, Cory thinks he’s doing a good deed by giving Shawn one of his own presents. This only angers Shawn, which causes Cory to wonder why he bothered to help in the first place.
Meanwhile, Morgan thinks she caused a mall Santa’s heart attack.

Let’s be honest, we don’t care about Morgan at all.  So, who cares if she killed Santa, they changed actresses who played Morgan in season 3 anyways.  So Cory gave Shawn his NBA basketball because he felt bad for him, and gave it expecting something in return.  According to Mr. Feeny though, “friendship for example is a real gift, it is given with no expectation, and no gratitude is necessary, not between true friends.”

Remember that one kids.

Dawson’s Creek – Season 6 Episode 10 – “Merry Mayhem” – Originally aired December 11, 2002

Awww, DC season 6, the final season.  Pacey is a successful business man of some sort, with AWESOME hair and and AWESOME GOATEE and Deputy Doug is jealous about his success, especially when he tries to buy his family nice gifts for one time in his life.

 

Look at my awesome hair and goatee.

BACK TO THE ACTION.

Dawson’s mom, fresh off her husbands car accident death, decides it would be a good idea to have one of the Leery Christmas dinners that were such a big tradition but never seen the past 5 seasons.  Bad idea, Joey’s dad is on his first visit back from prison and Joey is dating Eddie. (Played by Kate Hudson’s brother, Oliver Hudson) Eddie never graduated college, and is in between jobs, so he is not good enough for Mr. Potter.  Mr. Potter forgot he sold drugs out of his old restaraunt, The Icehouse, when Joey’s mom had already died from cancer.  Best dad ever!  Anyways, Joey also brings home Audrey, who when asked why she was even there says,  “I missed my flight bitch” who is drunk or on drugs, something crazy.  She calls everybody out for everything we always wanted to call them out on.  That is not all the crazy drama though.  Dawson is a PA on a movie set being shot in Boston and brings the director, Todd, back home for Christmas too.  He is also a drunk and hits on Dawson’s mom all weekend long.  Dawson also brings back his movie star girlfriend, Natasha, which makes Joey feel insecure I’m guessing.  Poor Joey.  Anyways, this is truly a great Christmas episode which is a perfect example of what Christmas is all about.

Beverly Hills, 90210 – Season 2 Episode 18 – “A Walsh Family Christmas” – Originally Aired December 19, 1991

This is a brand new entry on the list only because I got to watch it yesterday at my Grandma’s in between other stupid Christmas activities.  I don’t know what was more ridiculous about this episode, everyone eventually ending up at the Walsh house for Christmas dinner or that Brenda brought a homeless man dressed up as Santa who somehow has a bag full of expensive gifts and the only people who seem concerned by this are Brenda and Brandon’s parents.  It brought some great humor though, so just watch this and enjoy.

http://player.vimeo.com/video/16628606

200 Christmases In 2 Minutes from Cinefamily on Vimeo.

Attention: Gleetards

Noah,

I’m bringing ‘A Meeting of Minds’ back in full force tonight by resurrecting Kevin’s idea of Threads.  I’d like to challenge you to a full on discussion on the declining quality of this season of Glee.

You know my problems with it, lack of any sort of story this season.

Storylines I can remember from the first season, all might not be so great though, or even long – but at least they lasted longer than 1 episode.

1) The Schueman and his crazy wife going through the divorce thing.
2) Quinn getting knocked up by Puck, while dating Finn and being a clean teen or whatever.
3) Kurt coming out to his dad.
4) Kurt’s dad and Finn’s mom starting to date and the problems it causes with Finn and Kurt.
5) The black girl joining the  Cheerios and Puck dating her to become popular again.
6) The gym coach and Emma dating and getting married and will throwing fits about it.

Do you really want me to keep on going?  I can and I will if I need to.  They even got so desperate trying to fill episodes in Season 2 that they had to bring back the whole ‘Mash-Ups’ idea.  They are really struggling for original ideas now.

I’m interested in your defense as I feel I have a really strong case.

Annnnnnd go!